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Two Questions Before Going Back

Many of us are starting to experience some level of reopening of life to normal routines in our communities and are looking forward to things loosening even more in the coming weeks. As we contemplate our lives going forward with more freedom I want to offer you two questions for you to ponder before you go back to life as it was:

  • What things have you not been able to do in this time that you do not want to restart?

  • What things about your life have you learned in this time that you want to retain?

Blessings,
Stephen

Three Questions to Help

Hello Friends,

I want to share with you three questions you may use in your own personal reflection as well as to discuss as a family to help process the experience we are all having at this time. 

(1) What has the coronavirus taken away from me today? 

This question acknowledges and gives us permission to grieve. The virus has taken some things away from all of us that we will not get back.

(2) What has the coronavirus not taken from me today? 

When it feels like the whole earth is shaking underneath us it is good to see and grab onto that which is not moving. This question raises our awareness of the things that remain. Much has changed. Much remains the same.

(3) What has the coronavirus given to me today?

This question reminds to live as persons of gratitude. Even in the midst of suffering, there is hope. 

I have found these helpful to recenter and refocus on that which is important. I hope you find them helpful too.

Blessings,
Stephen

SOURCE: These questions were originally part of a webinar hosted by Fresh Expressions, "Light in Dark Times: Healing Souls During the Pandemic and Beyond" and came from from Jared Mackey, senior pastor of The Sacred Grace (Denver, CO)

Can we re-imagine church?

This afternoon I stood alone in our church sanctuary. I looked around me at the musical instruments that have gone silent, the screens that are dark, and the empty chairs. I saw our communion table and anointing oil sitting, waiting, for our return to celebrate and feast together. I wondered what it will be like to come back. Then as I sat in our dark space set aside for worship I began to wonder.

What if we re-imagined church in light of COVID-19?

This virus which is currently raging around the globe is shaking and changing our paradigms for ministry. It is not the first pandemic to ravage our globe, however, it is the first to strike the U.S. with such intensity in our lifetimes. This is causing many of us to question and ponder our sense of what is normal.

What if this is our new reality for the church? Some have postulated the questions and theories that this could be the beginning of seasonal pandemics. What if long periods each year or every few years of being “closed” or unable to meet in our buildings becomes our new reality?

What would be different about the way we do and think about church?

I will go on the record to say that I think the predictions are a little draconian. I believe, however, the questions that come out of them are essential to our future.

What would the church do differently if we met face-to-face nine months out of the year and virtually for three?

What is it that keeps us from doing these things now?

Finally, even as we think about these things, I want to leave you with a message of hope. This comes from the pen of a friend whose wisdom I value greatly:

Corona Virus: Finding a Realistic Hope Amid Hopelessness

“…all of us can find a realistic hope amid hopelessness.”

Stephen

Getting Better Every Day

question marks on trees
Marshall Goldsmith, outside of the world of business executives, is a name you may not know. He has been called “the world’s top-ranked executive coach.” He has helped some of the world’s highest performing men and women in the worlds of business, sport, and government get even better at what they do. And as crazy as it may sound, he pays a woman call him every single day to listen to him read questions he wrote and provide answers he himself came up with to those same questions. Why would he do such a thing?

Take a moment and watch his video:

After watching the video, what top three questions would you ask of yourself, every day, about the practices of your spiritual life? Do you have the courage them write it down? In the video, Marshall says, “If you have the courage to write down the behavior that’s most important in your life and the discipline to do this every day you are going to get a lot better.” What’s the “this” he is talking about? Well, you will have to watch the video.

Take some time to ponder and process. It is not nearly as easy as it may sound.

And now that you have watched the video here are a few additional things I have learned about the process.

First, if you take on this challenge, you are going to fail and it will be epic. You will become discouraged. You will want to quit. Your ego and self-esteem will take a cataclysmic beating. But don’t give up.

Second, not just anyone can be the person who hears you give your answers. It must be a positive person. It must be a person you trust. It must be a person whose commitment to you remains unchanged no matter how legendary your stumbling might be.

Third, the only feedback the person can give you is positive and encouraging feedback. We are our own worse critics. There is nothing the other person can say to you that will be worse than what you will already be saying to yourself. What you will need is someone to help you battle the negative thoughts and remind you, you can do more than you think possible.

What’s left? To do it, and don’t give up.

Blessings,
Stephen

 

 

Credits:
Post Photo by Evan Dennis on Unsplash

In the spring, when kings go off to war

canons on the battlefield

Dear Friends,

One of the most loaded verses in the Bible is also one easily missed. Found at the very beginning of 2 Samuel 11, we read, “In the spring, at the time when kings go off to war, David sent Joab out with the king’s men and the whole Israelite army. They destroyed the Ammonites and besieged Rabbah. But David remained in Jerusalem.”

What follows is the disastrous story of David, King of Israel, stealing another man’s wife. A man who was off fighting David’s battles. The woman, Bathsheba, becomes pregnant and David contrives to hide his sin ultimately killing her husband, Uriah, and other innocent men, all in an effort to hide a “moment of pleasure.”

In the story of David’s sin we find three questions, that, depending on how we answer them, can serve as a test to help us avoid the opportunity to sin. They are:

Am I where I should be?

David was the warrior king of Israel. The place he should have been was on the battlefield with the army. Had he been there, instead of on a rooftop at the palace, the possibility of his being tempted to sin would not have existed.

Am I with who I should be with?

David should have been, needed to be, with his men. With Joab his commander. With his army. These were his support community. These were the men who had the ability to tell the king, “No!” In the palace were only the servants who had to follow the king’s orders.

Am I doing what I should be doing?

As has already been said, David was a warrior king. His place was alongside Joab planning battlefield strategy. Instead, he was stuck in the palace in Jerusalem. Even if he was attending to the affairs of the growing city of Jerusalem it was not his role. He was the king, the management of the city should have been left to another. Had he been doing what he should have been doing likely his soul would not have been so restless he would seek to appease it with a one-night-stand.

When we sin we can come up with all kinds of excuses and justifications. The temptation was too great. I deserve a little pleasure. My spouse is not meeting my needs. If God had not wanted it to happen, he would not have opened the door.

But in the dark recesses our souls, if we are willing to be honest with ourselves, we know the reason for our sin and temptation is because of the answer to one or more of the questions above. We are not in the place we should be. We are not with the people we should be with. We are not doing what we should be doing. And because of this we are open and exposed to temptation. Failure is lurking at our doorstep.

Stephen

Forced on a Journey

empty roadway

Dear Friends,

Over the last few months, I have been on a spiritual journey producing a struggle in my own faith.

I, like you, watched the media reports of rioting in Ferguson, Missouri following the shooting of Michael Brown by a police officer.

I listened to the reports of Eric Garner being choked to death while being arrested by officers of the NYPD.

I attempted to comprehend what could have happened for Freddie Gray to suffer injuries leading to his death in the back of a Baltimore police van.

Over and over again I watched the video of Walter Scott being shot in the back as he ran away from a North Charleston, SC police officer

I was stunned by the images from a Texas pool party of an out of control police officer rapidly escalating an already tense situation.

I wanted to see each incident as unique. I wanted to say that this is not what law enforcement is like. And I don’t think it is, but I cannot deny that these events have happened and our nation reels because of them.

I wanted to process and look at each of these events in isolation from the other. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t do it because I saw and read the responses to the events from colleagues and church leaders. Men and women who have much more experience than I. Individuals far smarter than me. I saw these people standing in solidarity with the African American community as they demanded justice. The presence of these men and women, whom I greatly respected, standing on a different side of the debate gave me great pause. I began to question if I was not in fact wrong.

So I started to listen to myself. What I heard myself saying sounded an awful lot like the words of my white predecessors who spoke against the civil rights movement of the past and any efforts to change the status quo.

I knew then that I was wrong. But I did not know how or understand why. This realization was when my journey began.

Many of us are quick to quote Martin Luther King Jr. but would we have been so quick to quote him and stand beside him if we had lived through our nation seemingly being torn apart by the civil rights movement? What about today, as we watch our nation appears to be taking a journey down this path again?

I have been on a spiritual journey these past few months and in the next several posts I want to take you on that journey with me. I have many questions and very few answers.

Let’s walk together,
Pastor Stephen

The Beauty of Success

Success

Dear Friends,

I have shared with you in the past my propensity to listen to podcasts. A few days ago, while covered in drywall joint compound I listening to the Catalyst Podcast. I am not particularly good at applying joint compound, in fact I tend to get more on me than the walls, but that is topic for another day. I digress . . . the podcast was an interview with the musicians Matt Wertz and Dave Barnes. Each was asked what he was learning in life right now. Dave’s answer to the question caused me to put down the mud. Dave said that he has been thinking a lot about success lately and what it means to be successful. “The beauty of success is that we each get to define it our own way . . . The danger is when we start to believe and adopt other people’s definitions of success to become our own because then we are not living true to the calling in our set of circumstances . . .If we are not careful we can redefine something that I have already defined and am really happy with.”

There are a lot of things to ponder in these few words.

1. We get to define success ourselves; but have we? How many of us in have actually defined what it is that we are looking for and growing into. As someone once said, “If you aim at nothing you will hit it every time.”

2. Do we really want to be successful at what we are doing? When we see people who are the top of what we are seeking to be successful at we rarely notice the scars they carry and they price they pay to be where they are at. Have we looked at their scars? Are we willing to pay that price?

3. If we have defined our success and are “really happy with” the place where we are at and the path we are on we must be vigilant to not allow others to redefine success for us and breed discontent into our souls.

4. Finally, if we have defined what it means for to be successful, but the path we are on will not take us there, why have we not changed? What is keeping us from changing? Have we set a date to make the change?

What about you? Have you defined what it means for you to be successful? Have you ever allowed someone else to define it for you? Share your thoughts below or on Facebook

Blessings,
Pastor Stephen

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